The Beautiful Ending

What if the end of relationships was as beautiful, wonderful, loving, exciting, sweet and passionate as the beginning?

*******

Nina's waiting for Jason at the door when he gets home from work. He looks tired.

Without saying a word, she takes his briefcase and sets it down, takes his jacket off and lays it across the back of his favorite chair. Then she folds herself into his arms and kisses him passionately.

When she's done, he doesn't let her go. "What was that for, baby?"

"For us. Come here," she says and leads him to the fireplace. She picks up a folded sheet of paper from the mantel and hands it to him.

"What's this?"

"A list of everything you've done wrong or not done right in our relationship. All the hurts, pains, disappointments...every tear I've cried over you."

"What?" he laughs. Is she serious?

She picks up a second sheet, actually two sheets. "And this is a list of everything I've done wrong or not done right in our relationship. All the hurts, pains, disappointments I've caused you."

"Okay. So are we supposed to read them together?" He hates this game already.

"No." She takes his list out of his hand and tosses it into the fire. Then she hands him her list.

He starts to unfold it, laughing. "I think I want to read yours. I might need to add some things."

"Jason!"

"I'm just kidding, baby. I don't need nor want to keep a list." He tosses it into the fire.

Still he has to ask, "Why was your list longer than mine?"

Nina looks lovingly into Jason's eyes. "Because I didn't write anything on your sheet of paper."

He loves this woman. Why can't they make it work? Nevermind. He knows why. He looks back into her eyes.

They can both see it. They have always been able to read each other without saying a word. Now which one of them is going to say it?

"It's over, isn't it?" she asks as she wraps her arms around his neck.

"Not unless you want it to be," he responds as he puts his arms around her waist.

"You know I never want 'us' to end. But we can't go on like this. I want more. But I know you've given me all you can give. I won't ask you to change. Not anymore." She smiles at him, even as her eyes fill with tears.

"Oh baby, don't cry," he says wiping her tears. "We said we'd be together forever. I told you that you were my 'one,' and you said I was your 'one.' That will never change. Even if we can't be together physically, our hearts can always be together."

"What does that mean?" she asks laughing through her tears.

Jason laughs, too. "It sounded deep, didn't it?" He stops smiling. "It means true love just is, Nina. Regardless of circumstances, differences, betrayals, arguments, infidelities, flaws, faults, untruths...true love still remains."

Nina wants to be sure she understands. "So, you're saying that even though we're breaking up, we can still love each other?"

"Not can. Will. We won't be able to help it. Love doesn't end with a break-up."

He takes her hand and leads her to the couch, wrapping his arm around her as they sit. He tilts her head up to his and looks in her eyes.

"We don't even have to break up if you don't want to, Nina. That's your choice."

She pulls away and looks directly at him. "No, baby. That's not fair. Our relationship began because we both made a choice to love each other and step into 'us' together. If we end, it has to be mutual, too. Just as I couldn't start our relationship alone, I can't make the choice to end it alone." She takes a deep breath. "Now, are you ready to walk away, Jason?"

Jason is torn. He doesn't want it to be over, but he can't give Nina all she wants and needs. He can't give himself to her 100%. To continue would be selfish, but to end would break his heart. There's pain either way. Perhaps...

"If we break up now, can we continue to be friends?" Maybe he can use a lifeline.

"I don't know. Possibly. But probably not right away. I can't pretend I only want to be your friend when I see you." She sees the disappointment on his face. "Jason, can't you still love me even if we can't be friends? If true love really exists through betrayals, infidelities, and all those other things you said, wouldn't it still exist even if we couldn't be friends?"

He knows she's right. Friendship may not be an option, at least for a while. And he'll love her anyway. And she'll love him.

He still can't say it.

"Jason, it's okay. 'We' began because we saw something in each other that we both fell in love with, something we both wanted. We chose to be each other's 'one,' believing that we could sustain that commitment. But we found out that we couldn't sustain it - for whatever reason - circumstances, bad choices, personality changes, rumors, lies, temptations, baggage, you name it. Just because we couldn't sustain it doesn't mean it wasn't real, that it wasn't wonderful, that it wasn't special. It was. I have no regrets."

He shakes his head, "What about all those things you said during our last argument? All those regrets you said you had?"

"I just burned them in the fire."

"If you really burned them, then why don't you want to try again?"

"Three reasons: I'm still the same person. You're still the same person. And our circumstances haven't changed. If any one of those things changes, I'd try again with you in a heartbeat."

"What if they never do?" he asks.

"Then I'll still always love you, just like you said. But we just won't be able to be together."

"I hate failing, Nina. You know that."

"We didn't fail, Jason. We loved. We chose to love. We chose to be together. And we'll still love, even as we choose not to be together. It's not a failure. It's a choice. We know what it would take to make it work between us. We're choosing not to do those things."

She's right. He's not ready to do anything differently - be someone different - not right now. Maybe not ever. And neither is she.

"Okay. Let's say it together." He takes her hands.

They turn and look at each other. A deep breath, and then...

"I love you," they say in unison.

They both crack up laughing. And then they hug. Tightly. And probably for the last time.


"Goodbye, Jason. I'll love you forever," she whispers in his ear.

"Ditto, Nina," he whispers back in hers.

**************

To my "one," and all the wonderful men I've ever loved...


Constantly Thinking