I recently had a long overdue physical. The doctor asked all the pertinent questions and did all the appropriate tests. I shared all my relevant history and dutifully had a list of my current symptoms and maladies ready to discuss with him.
I rarely go to the doctor, not because I have anything against them, but because I rarely get sick. In fact, up until recently I only had emergency medical insurance. I was prompted to get full coverage, however, when at the end of last year, I got the flu, the norovirus, then the flu again with laryngitis! I figured that meant it was time for a check-up.
After meeting with my new primary care physician, I was told I would only get a call if there was a problem with my test results. Less than 24 hours later, I received the dreaded call. My heart sank.
It seems I've crossed over from "pre-diabetic" to full blown diabetes. My numbers were so high, the doctor said, that it required me to be on medication immediately. Fortunately, I can be treated with the oral meds and do not need insulin injections at this time.
Upon hearing my diagnosis I experienced a range of emotions - fear, sadness, worry and a bit of anger, frankly.
Why anger? Two reasons.
First, when they told me a few years ago that I was pre-diabetic, their advice was "lose weight and exercise more." So I did!
I'm the lowest weight I've been in 16 years, after having lost 50 lbs and dropped five sizes! (Woohoo!) Granted, I'm not yet at my goal weight, but I broke through that pesky plateau and now I'm making even greater progress.
I'm also exercising more and doing much better with my eating habits.
Which comes to the second reason I'm angry.
My eating habits have always been a challenge, but not in the way that most people think (including doctors). For me, "healthy eating habits" means the opposite of what it means for most people. I actually have to eat more to lose weight. My previous habit was to skip breakfast, eat a late lunch (if at all) and either eat no dinner or eat my first meal of the day at dinnertime. My portions were still small or normal size. Over-eating was not my issue. Instead, I unintentionally put my body into starvation mode.
This has been going on for more than 20 years.
After spending a hungry week with me back in 1993, my sister told me that I didn't even eat enough to maintain my weight. She surmised then that I was probably putting my body into starvation mode.
I didn't listen. (Which is why I'm angry with myself.)
A baby, a failed marriage, and several dozen pounds later, my eating habits were still the same. I'd eat every now and then.
With the exception of sweet coffee or tea, I didn't overload on sugar. I'm not a soft drink girl. I rarely eat candy, or dessert, or carbs, or anything!
Last year, when my church began the Daniel fast, I prayed about how I was to participate. My answer came fast, loud, and clear: "EAT BREAKFAST!" So while everyone else was cutting things out, I added food to my diet. Almost immediately, I lost 25 pounds!
Eating breakfast caused my metabolism to kick in. It made me hungry for lunch, and when I ate lunch then I was hungry for dinner. I enjoyed small sensible meals and they did the trick. My body released the weight it was desperately holding onto - just in case it didn't get another meal.
Thanks to my good friend Valerie, I was also able to add in some fun cardio. (Beyonce's birthday video helped, too. Dancing with her is a definite work-out!)
Then I plateaued. At some point last year, however, I broke through the plateau and started losing again. I'm not sure what triggered the much-needed drop. Perhaps it was the flu or the norovirus. Or perhaps it was the strong talking-to I gave my body. Words combined with the mental determination can be very powerful.
So now here I am. Eating better, exercising more, 50+ lbs lighter, and STILL diagnosed as diabetic. Yes, I know, it's reversible. Already my numbers have come down from 321 (!!) to 188, and today 166. I'll be back to normal numbers in no time. However, there is other damage that may have been done from my irregular eating habits.
That's mostly why I'm angry. I am angry at myself for not realizing the long-term damage that inconsistent eating could potentially do. Everyone understands the dangers of over-eating. Most people don't realize the danger of under-eating. My sister is trying her best to get me to not be so hard on myself. (Gotta love sisters.)
My new doctor, because he doesn't know me, told me I need to decrease my calorie intake, eat less, and continue losing weight. I'll continue losing, no doubt, but not in the way he suggested. That would have the opposite effect. I know from experience.
Anyway, I'm sharing this with my blog fans to encourage you to do whatever is necessary to get healthy - whether that's eating less or more, exercising, and getting a check up!
Know your body...and take care of it well. It's the only one you have. And when you get it wrong, like I did, try not to be so hard on yourself.
Constantly Thinking...
